Friday, January 2, 2009

And tired?

It is official now.

I am never again suggesting to the ex that we have lunch. Or really, anything. No plans will be made.

It's not that I'm mad or hate him...it's that we can never ACTUALLY do this. I've tried several times now to invite him to have lunch to talk about the things we need to do and, honestly, because I thought it would be nice. We are attempting to be friends here.

Yet, every single time. Every. Single. TIME. He is sick. Flu, colds, bronchitis, twisted ankles, thrown out back...you name it, he's had it when we are supposed to get together. And inevitably he forgets to call me and tell me so I am left waiting for him to show up and when I do call I am told he can't make it.

Some of you reading this might think that this is all a bit TOO convenient. A bit coincidental. But you did not live with this person for the last two years - anytime anything remotely stressful came up or happened, he got sick. Or, if an injury could take place, it did.

He has said to me that he thinks that it was because of his stress due to my actions that he was sick all the time the last two years. (Another way of putting the blame for absolutely everything in his life onto me.) And it seems to be that anytime we have plans to do something he is sick again.

It's irritating. I'm now worried that when it comes to getting things done and taken care of for the paperwork of the divorce process that he won't be there or able to do it because he is sick. I'm worried that on the eventual court date for the divorce he won't make it because he is sick and that the judge will not let it go through without him there.

I'm worried that I'll never be able to see my friend again because he'll be sick anytime we have plans.

I can't do anything about his health, but I can do something about MY making plans with him.

And so...no more lunch plans. I'm very very tired - one could say sick and tired - of hearing the excuses.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

if your ex wants to remain friends with you, then he has to start acting like a grown-up and not a five year old kid.

you should not give him an opportunity to upset you, and if that means you shouldn't have lunch with him, then so be it.

eventually he will realize that you no longer need him in your life, that you have moved on with your life. perhaps he'll then want to be friends again.